Love and Trust

Love and Trust is something I struggle with on a daily basis. I don't trust easily and when I do trust you, if that trust is broken it is a very long road to recover and build that trust back up. My heart has been broken too many times to count. My ex-husband left me for another woman, my "real" dad left my mom for my current step-mother, my son's father was/is emotionally and verbally abusive. So many broken promises, so much hurt and pain, so much negativity. When I met Nick, we were in the 8th grade. We went to high school together, hung out with the same crowd, but I had no interest in him. He joined the marines, I went to college, we both came home hung out at the same parties, with the same people we kept in touch with, but never together. In January 2010, I joined Facebook and he we became friends on there. I reached out to him and asked if he wanted to hang out, have a drink and we did. We were together pretty much most of the time. I fell for him fast, faster then I wanted. We both did. I still needed to work on myself and he wasn't ready for a built in family. In May, we took a break, saw other people for about 5 months. In November of 2010, he reached out to me and we have been together ever since. We had to build a relationship, we built trust in each other, we already loved each other but that love has grown so much, and over the past 4 years we have learned to live with each other, to communicate even when we are upset or angry which doesn't happen very often, but it does happen. He has helped me so much to heal from past relationships, working through the pain, the hurt, the negativity. He has shown me that he has way more patience than I do. He is willing to work things out, and is not quick to anger but stays very calm even when I am not. He has shown me how to be a very loving man and how much I mean to him. He has shown my son what it means to love someone even when they are not your blood. He is more of a father to my son than his own father is or ever will be. I can not be more grateful for what he has done for me and my son. He has broken those chains and built a life with me and my son, we have become a family. This is something I have always wanted. I can't wait for the day we are husband and wife, until it is official. I can't wait for the day that we find out we are having a baby and to watch him as he becomes a father to his own child and our family expands. I can't wait for the day we get the keys to our own home. There are so many things that I love about him and the life we are building together. The things I look forward to as we go through this journey of life together as partners as a couple, as parents, as a family.